A new column appears every Sunday on radioaalsmeer.nl, written by and for Aalsmeerers or Kudelstaarters. This week’s thirteenth column is by Kim Marcy Verschueren: “mental health”.
Should I write it or not? To be honest, I wasn’t on my mind yet when I saw the deadline for the new column pass. I haven’t been feeling well lately. So much has happened, and at the same time so little has happened, that I have had no inspiration to write a new column. Is a column about mental health something people have been waiting for?
This topic is often overshadowed by physical health. While we all strive to stay fit and healthy, we sometimes forget that our mental state is just as important. In our rapidly changing world, mental health is becoming increasingly important.
Mental health is a state of well-being in which we feel able to manage daily stress, form relationships, and contribute to our community. But what happens when this balance is disturbed? Stress, anxiety, and depression can greatly impact our lives, but they are often not talked about.
One of the biggest challenges is the stigma that still surrounds mental health issues. People are ashamed to ask for help, afraid of being judged, and perhaps even condemned.
We all live with our hidden struggles, and for me that is fibromyalgia, a chronic condition that presents a new challenge every day. I was diagnosed thirteen years ago, and pain has been a constant presence in my life ever since. Days vary from very good to extremely painful, and in general I’ve learned to live with them. I have the sweetest husband in the world, two precious children (I sometimes like to keep them behind the wallpaper), a nice workplace, and wonderful people around me. It makes me think often “Come on Kim, don’t complain so much. Put your shoulders on the wheel. There are worse things in life.”
I consider myself a happy person, despite the limitations this sometimes imposes.
However, there are periods when life seems harder and fibromyalgia causes not only physical complaints but also psychological complaints. I can’t seem to put my shoulder on the wheel anymore. Then I find it difficult to enjoy things around me. Sadness, anxiety, and an overwhelming sense of uncertainty can suddenly overwhelm me. The stimuli around me hit me harder, and panic attacks and sleepless nights were no longer far away. In those difficult moments, I have to return to my base. I have to take better care of myself, and listen better to my body. It’s not always easy, especially in a world that’s often about “keep going” and “put your shoulders on the wheel.” A world I often feel like I “should” join. It’s tempting to hide those sad feelings, because who wants to be a burden on others? I have now learned that the longer you keep up appearances, the deeper you fall.
In the end, we all have our challenges and emotions, that’s life. However, we often forget that every person is different in the way they deal with these challenges. Sometimes it’s just too much and you need an extra bit of support, a listening ear or a simple comment like: “It’s going to be okay, honey.”
I’m now aware of countless tips and tricks for maintaining my mental health, just like my physical health. But as far as I’m concerned, there’s one thing that’s most important: that we take care of each other more often. Let’s ask each other: “How are you now?” And not just for your best friend over a beer or that friend who you can have a good laugh with. Also think about your neighbor who has been alone for a while, or that colleague who always sits alone during break. The new mother with the sleepless nights and that stubborn teenager hiding under the hood.
Let’s not only ask these questions, but listen to them. Listening without judgment, without wanting to answer quickly or give advice. Just be present in the moment, and let the other person know that their feelings matter.
Let’s break down the barriers surrounding mental health. It’s okay to not always feel okay and sometimes not be strong. Maybe together we can create an environment where being open about our struggles is not only valued, but considered normal.
Kim Mars Verschueren
Kim Marcy Verschueren is 39 years old, born and raised in Aalsmeer. She is married to Bas, mother to Faye (12 years old) and Vidi (7 years old). He loves to laugh, suffers from fibromyalgia, sometimes has difficulty with that “bar” and prefers to live in Efteling. In addition to Kim’s work at Yuverta vmbo Aalsmeer, she and her daughter create a podcast called “De Brugcast,” which is about going to first grade. She loves writing about things she encounters in her daily life.
Image: Pixabay (for clarification)
Published: October 20, 2024 at 9:00 AM, by Elbert Hoijts
