“My ex-husband, the father of our sons, adopted a very unhealthy lifestyle after our divorce. He stuffs himself every night with chips and crackers and Ghost knows what else too. I notice my kids adopt these habits, because there is no restraint with their father. They are with him every two weeks during the week and he allows Always treat them with sweets and fats in the afternoon after school and in the evening in front of the TV, because he takes them himself. ”
“Our kids are 11 and 14 and they are so touching. Because their dad has ‘spoiled’ them so much, they want the same with me. I have to stop him, which makes him more and more indivisible in relation to them – their own words. I want to be able I have to do something about it, but of course I can’t make their dad black with them either. I won’t change my ex either. What can I do?”
Metta Hermann de Groot, a teen coach and parenting expert, immediately wonders if Laysan and her ex-husband have come to agreements about the well-being of their children. “It is true that you have no influence on your ex’s diet. But as parents, it is very important to have a certain agreement when it comes to your children’s health, and that includes healthy food. That’s why I wonder if agreements have been made on this and if You as parents were able to discuss this matter.”
After all, if counseling is possible, as Hermann de Groot explains, you can handle things with the other person in a simple way. Your ex may not be aware enough that his or her unhealthy lifestyle is affecting children’s eating habits. They may not realize that this has consequences for their health, energy management, and relationship with food. As parents you are the ancestors of your children. In everything you do, scream and consume. Children easily imitate the behavior of their parents.
As far as Hermann de Groot is concerned, it never hurts to have a conversation with kids about nutrition. After all, your job as a parent is to educate them about nutrition, even if their dad apparently has a different view of it. “You can explain to them what it means if they often eat unhealthy things. Tell them they may struggle with this later, and above all, explain why you think it is so important to make them aware of this. Together you can find balance at home. You can You and your children look for ways to keep up.”
Because it is not necessary to stop giving delicious things altogether, because their father does a lot, as Hermann de Groot believes. “Don’t try to make up. Don’t argue: Because they got so many unhealthy things from their dad, they couldn’t do anything with me anymore. You can still feel free to give your kids something nice now and then, especially if you’ve discussed it with them.”